THE SECOND ARROW

There's a parable the Buddha gifted us to relate with suffering more skillfully. Any time we suffer affliction, two arrows are let loose in our direction. To be pierced by the first arrow is painful. To be struck by the second arrow is even more excruciating.

The first arrow is an actual hardship, which can cause pain. We meet these arrows often in life: a friend turning their back on us, financial setback, or some other tribulation. There is no doubt - these things are painful. 

The second arrow is our reaction to these challenges. It’s how we choose to respond. All of the judgments, self-loathing, and doubt live here. This can be even more painful than the first arrow if allowed to fester. 

With practice and awareness, we can open to the experience of the first arrow and allow it to convey its wisdom without creating echoes of the event in our ego. We can't avoid being struck by an occasional arrow. The second arrow, however, we can allow to pass us by...